??Why waste it when you can taste it???

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2024/02/12 00:07:15 GMT02/11/2024 2024/02/12 00:07:15 GMT02/11/2024

Description

Has your ego been hurt by a nagging wife?

Have your feelings suffered an injury inflicted by a crappy girlfriend?

Have you been locked in, tied down to and emotionally tormented in...

"THE FRIENDZONE"?

If you answered 'yes' to these or any other question(s) you have been asked thus far today, give me,Esmerelda Slobbahknob, have at least an $80 (max $130, incalls add a handling fee of $25) donation ready and give me a text rightnow. I am here to serve in the areas of

-Ego Boosting, Moments of Happiness, Delusions of Grandeur, Emotional Release, Seminal Release and WordPerfect 2.0-

TEXT

217-360-XXXX between the hours of 6:30pm and 1:00am for an appointment, walk ins welcome

Operators are standing by

(if I don't answer right away, don't panic. You aren't the only man on earth and I also have my own personal hell to handle on a daily basis. I'll get back to you, let me know if I shouldn't call or text in case your taken/married. Discretion is my #1 priority)

217-360-XXXX

This has been a paid advertisement from "The Law Offices of Esmerelda Slobbahknob" a non-profit entertainment company, not a real attorney.

Don't forget to mention you found me on OneBackPage.com!

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